Some students will be excited welcoming a new semester after a long break,
some of it will be worry about facing abundant tasks or finishing their thesis,

... ME?
worrying about how my schizophrenic aunty wont let me go outside or worse, she wants to follow me everywhere, even when I have to take mid exam.

Z,
1.36 pm,
in a train heading to surabaya

There was one day that I had 3 identity in one hand.

I had to be Windia, my junior in college.
It was a hectic time like I always did, I went to my ex-college to present my research that I conduct in front of the judge but because I have to graduate earlier so I got my junior to replace me AND because she didn't know anything about my research, I had to be her to be able to present the research perfectly. Not to mention that I deliberately chose her as my substitute because she pretty much looks like me. My friends was always mistaken about  calling me windi* during her first year.

After the presentation done, I had to cross an island to take TOEFL test at one of university I never go to, as Irma Y. I wanna help someone to pass a certain score so that he can graduate on time but I ended up helping everyone on that class (lol) because the test itself was not that secure like my university always did.
Something that I have to make it clear that I didn't earn money to do that. Put an emphasis on it.

The thing is, sometimes 'being anybody else' to make something
done properly, or to help someone is important.

Risk taker or rule breaker? name it.

P.S: But then again, I didn't realize that what I've done to make everything'w done properly always beat me up in the end. Gotta tell you later.

Pas kamu lagi nongki sama temen ato sodara, trus kamu check in di suatu tempat di path ngetag temen/sodara kamu, sedangkan mereka enggak tag kamu balik.

MUNGKIN MASALAH SEPELE, TAPI SAKITNYA TUH DISINI.

Setengahnya ngerasa gak dianggep,
Seperempatnya ngerasa mungkin doski malu ketauan temen2nya lagi hangout sama kamu,
Sisanya kapok update2 lagi ngetag itu temen/sodara di socmed.

Kapok. titik.

Minal aidzin wal faidzin
Forgive me if I ever did or said anything harsh to you
May Allah's blessings fill your life with happiness

Have a joyful and blessed Eid Mubarak!

is a small note opened on the corner of my desktop.
I used to write new vocabularies there right after I watched film or tv series.
Vocabularies that I never get in any english class here.


but then, my sister just .. closed it.



P.S.: I strangled her three times .. in my mind.

If someone ever tells you that your eyebrows are too thick and ugly,
Stop talking to them.
You dont need that kind of negativity in your life.
*perhaps they never know about cara delevingne

did you feel that your life go wrong too far right now? feel empty because of all achievement you can't achieve?
because in this middle age, your weight is increasing rapidly (and still counting)?
or because (it seems like) anyone else get a better life than yours?

if the answer is yes, the first thing that come up with is,
are you sure that's what you did is the one that let you down?
because sometimes, it happens because you took so much shit from people around you.
they make you think that ideal weight is less than 50kg, or success parameters are working at prestigious company, or high salary, or being able to buy a car at your first year, and so on.
they never say what you do is right.

in my opinion, there are 2 types of person in this world,
a negative or positive one.
and this is how to define a negative person:


if you find any difficulties in defining that kind of person, just look at him right now.
after all he said to you, does he even in a good (or, if i could say, what other people said as wealth, or other success parameter) condition right now?

you won't get hurt except  you let yourself or anyone else define you badly.
be wise to keep the positive person around you, and stay away from the negative one.